7 Days and Nights in Yoga Land: The Mud Pile Blues (Intro)
About a week ago I found myself cringing at the thought of getting onto my mat.
I wanted out. Oy vay. Yoga felt like a burden. How did this happen?! Life just seemed too challenging, busy, a million things pressing from all directions, that the mat too felt like yet another set of challenges. I knew that deepening into my practice would force me to be in the present moment, and whatever lives there. This is not always a desirable place to be, I admit.
As a teacher, I have to pull myself out of my own personal distractions, disengagement, issues, and find a way to bring inspiration – Breath – into my students for that hour and a half. And whenever I do, wow, I am lifted beyond my own burdens and into a deeper place. Giving and teaching yoga is the ultimate high and centering experience simultaneously.
But recently, inspiration was hard to find. I’d forgotten that joy of teaching from just the week before. Everything felt very ordinary. And full of tasks. Busy-ness. And literally, Dirt.
Its easier to get all yoga-fied when we are here: Ahhhhhhhhhhh…………
Then when we are here: Ughhhhhhh………………………………
This was supposed to be my front porch meditation perch: Ahhhhhhhh…….Er…….Ugh………
You get it. I thought that just being able to live with this work in progress yard (stay tuned for more posts on my home reno projects), and messiness everywhere, meant that I was reaching some new level of yogic mastery. But, no, not really. It was all a nice excuse to stay off my mat. And leave my breath, mind AND body out of alignment. Its nice to think your way into acceptance, but its another thing to really become in balance.
The lesson here is that sometimes we need to practice – do – even when we are not inspired, even when we feel we are beyond busy. Even when there is a mud pile surrounding us from all angles. When we sit to meditate, or slow down, and just breathe, we discover that we may need to accept a little longer some messy situation, some difficult, ugly thing. And trust in its eventual transformation. Moving our bodies, and breathing into all our physical and mental holdings, helps us to not only transform our body’s stress, but our mind’s as well.
Sometimes allowing the beauty of yoga to flow in and out of us even in the midst of something we don’t think we can face for one more minute, actually helps to dissipate that very thing we wanted to avoid.
Ha. I know this to be true. So, I’m back to reclaim my practice yet again – back to the beginning.
Hence, 7 Days and Nights in Yoga Land.
OK, I’m gonna leave it at that, and we’ll re-visit this theme tomorrow – teaching class today at 5:30PM and then taking class for myself after.
What are you doing for yourself this week to get out of the proverbial Mud Pile Blahs and into your Autumnal Inspiration?