Inhale, Exhale. Sigh. Yaaaawn. Still trying to find my breathing apparatus flow over here. Just getting up. The mental is a little slow today, despite Almost Husband’s painstakingly complex scientific strong coffee making ritual. Long night of various cats and dogs taking turns burrowing in the covers, human and canine snoring, dreams – nightmares? – of water drainage yard issues, wedding guest lists (not to mention where, what, when?), visions of patios and walls sinking into mud, then waking up in the wee hours and being led half awake into the living room by the sounds of Ira’s insomniac TV watching adventure, The Man Who Fell To Earth.
I’d like to fall to Earth. Feel a little more human, less humanoid. And drink more water. (Movie reference, IMDB it). But really, drink more water, its good for you. Lately I’ve been reaching a little too much into the worry stratosphere, my breathing getting lost in arbitrary thoughts, concerns, what if’s. Hmmm.
There’s a lot going on this month – preparing for a CD release show in November, work is picking up, writing, promoting, house reno. All the things to do are swirling around like the tree branches outside my window right now. Feels like there’s no rhyme or reason. Just swirl. I’d like to say I can control the wind. But sometimes we need to just let that swirling be; Things will calm down eventually. Even though it is scary. We cling, we want. We thirst. I try to focus on now. Try to detach a little more. This is part of my daily yoga practice. It has nothing to do with Down Dog, Child’s Pose, Triangle.
Which brings me to Yoga Month. Is this the beginning of a new Hallmark Holiday: Cards for loved ones that tell them to “Just Breathe”?. Flowers with cards that say “Just stop and smell the roses”? I was just going about my weekly yoga teaching, when suddenly I noticed it everywhere – yoga class discounts, community yoga activism, articles in my local Natural Awakenings magazine…When did this happen? Why September? And just, Why?
I could be cynical and go on about corporate yoga land’s efforts at promoting and selling yoga products and such – and in some ways, for any business person, a month focussing on such things can only help the bottom line. I wish though, that the name of this new month of __________ (Insert your Bottom Line Here) would be a little more descriptive, more proactive. Less VAGUE. Less room for the cynics.
Some ideas: “Fall Back to Earth” month? “Help your Neighbor” month. “Be Kind to Yourself” month. And so on. Weirdly, when I launched this blog in early September, I dubbed September “Pay it Forward” Month.
I like it. That sums it up for me right now. That’s my RIGHT NOW bottom line. I want to bring yoga MIND into action. This not only helps me get out of my own Thirsty Alien Mind (Too much clinging, too much desiring, too much disconnection, too much upper stratosphere reaching), but gets me moving, connecting. giving back.
There are great organizations out there that are doing such things – like Yoga Across America, The Yoga Health Foundation, and etc. I’m learning about new ones everyday. My idea is not an original one. And its being done on a much smaller scale.
But for me, giving back in a small yet direct, intimate way is most gratifying right now. Kind of like how it feels when I perform and can feel the audience connecting, receiving, opening. Dare I say, even transforming. I launched my Pay it Forward Campaign to help a fellow musician and aspring yogi take her next step by going to yoga school.
Helping Shelley this month has been a cure for my Thirsty Alien Mind (TAM) like no other. Knowing that all the promotion, the work, the worry, has been to ease someone else’s burdens – and to help birth another healer, has been so beautiful a process for me. Thank you to all near and far in my life who have donated your energy/$$. We thank you. Shelley has made her downpayment at Kripalu – and now needs to raise the rest of the funds to actually get her in the door (and have someplace to sleep).
TONIGHT at 8PM I am performing my original music as part of this process – and will donate all proceeds to Shelley’s yoga school fund. Read about the show here!
Ahhh. The winds have died down. There. I feel a little bit better. My breath is back. I’m ready to birth this baby and go out walking with Hazel. A little walking meditation never hurt anyone.
Earth is closer than I thought.